JUST FOR YOU……
Just for you
My boys where young Julien was about 12 and Jared about 8 years old when I decided on a cold Saturday morning to ditch the family and go do all the errands solo. It was 6:30 in the morning and my husband at the time and children were in a deep sleep, so I dressed and hit the highway. I blasted my music and did 65 mph down the Southern State Parkway to Roosevelt Field, now Costco and the malls were still closed but I felt like I was breaking free and if I would have stayed in the house a moment longer or spent another Saturday with my all-male entourage, I would have lost it for sure.
First stop was Panera, a good cup of coffee and a toasted blueberry bagel all by myself was everything I needed as a Mom. When the cashier asked will you be adding anything else to this order, I laughed and said, “nope I ditched my family today.” I sat in a warm corner looking out at the main road, sipping my coffee, and adjusting to hearing my own thoughts. I could tell by the increase in traffic that the stores were about to open and sure enough it was 8:00 a.m. I knew the kids were probably wide awake and looking for the traditional Saturday breakfast. I savored the last bite of my chewy blueberry bagel and thought to myself they will figure it out. I headed to Costco shopped in record time and headed to my next stop, the supermarket. Last stop the mall to grab the boys some shirts.
I ended up walking the mall alone for hours, just going in and out of stores, sampling chocolates in Godiva, letting all the ladies in Macy’s spray perfumes on me and trying on shoe after shoe in DSW. I was having such a good time alone, I laughed when the time said 1:30. Let me head home, I hid my chocolates in the bottom of my pocketbook, they were just for me. I am far from selfish, but I was exhausted from taking care of my family wondering if it was ever going to be my time again. I spent a day alone that changed how I operated going forward. It was ok not to go shopping with the entire family, it was okay to eat alone. This took nothing away from my parenting skills or from me being a wife. It was a way to preserve my sanity.
As I drove home with my SUV trunk loaded, I thought to myself what a miracle it would be if I arrived home to a cleaned-out refrigerator, a freshly mopped kitchen floor or perhaps the carpets vacuumed and glass furniture sparkling. I kept on driving and had an epiphany, so I drove to the White Castle Burger Restaurant and grabbed me, yes me (not the family) a lunch meal. I ordered 4 burgers (no worries they are ridiculously small), fries, a coke, and an apple pie. I pulled out of the drive through and sat in the parking lot enjoying my music and my meal. I wanted no evidence, so I dumped my trash wiped my mouth and drove 10 minutes to my house. I pulled in the driveway and honked the horn; my men came out looking like they just woke up.
I directed them to bring in the groceries, I walked into the house and it was their version of clean and that worked for me. I asked if the children if they ate and thankfully, they said yes. They had cereal and toasted bagels and their Daddy told them to clean up so they could get dressed and go to the batting range. They put the groceries away, got dressed and left.
My belly was full, my mind cleared out and I did something just for me. I curled up on my bed and then remembered the stash of Godiva truffles in the bottom of my pocketbook and slid one in my mouth as I made myself comfortable. It is ok to do something just for you while you are raising your minor children, as they are growing older so are you. So, take a break from them, treat yourself to something, even if it is just a tube of lipstick on payday or a slip away to your favorite restaurant and eat alone, if you do not teach your children how to treat you, they will think you have undying energy and have no need for restoration. Do something just for you.
It’s ok to take do something just for you!
